This was the exchange between the landlord of my local and a dozy chav bint last night. Made me smile and think of this thread.
Girl. "Can I get 2 Bacardi Breezers and a white wine?"
Landlord. "No, that's what I do"
Girl. "Huh"
Landlord. "That's what I do, You ask me for a drink, I get them for you, you pay me"
Girl. "Yeh?"
Landlord. "So would you like me to get your drinks for you?"
Girl> "Yeh cool"
When she got back to her mates I heard her say "Wos is fakin problem"
The Landlord tutted and rolled his eyes.