Chris Zarse

[Andy Zarse]

Those of you who have met Chris Zarse know that he's a truly horrible c**t, his sick teeshirts are legendary. But spare a thought for for him this week, as he has proved himself to be a horrible c**t with a very big heart.

He has been tissue matched with an unknown recipient suffering with leukemia by the Anthony Nolan Bone Marrow Trust. So this week he's being operated on in Harley Street to have two litres of bone marrow extracted from his pelvis and femur. The operation is conducted by drilling fifteen holes into each side of his body, inserting a nine inch needle with a sucker on the end and then pumping out the marrow to extract the stem cells. He will only be under local anaesthetic as he is required to be "compliant" through the operation.

That's the good bit. The downside is that the surgeon has told him, perfectly frankly, it is one the most exquisitely painful operations known to man; if they started inflicting this sort of pain on people in Abhu Graib, Amnesty International would be absolutely up in arms about it.

So spare a thought for the pot-bellied boozer, I guarantee you're gonna have a better week than him!

[Nobby Diesel]

Top bloke.

I thought going to give blood this afternoon was an inconveience.

[BigH]

Well done Chris, you t*** you! Who'll be wearing the sick tee shirts next year then? Where did he get this sudden rush of altruism from, was he drunk?- Hats off, and pants down down for the man, if it'll help the pain any.
Personally speaking, I know exactly what he's going through. Mrs H has just had a major transplant, and I've spent pretty well the last six months (hence my absence from the forum) wondering just exactly what the hell it's all about, life and everything, you know. Things seem to be going just hunky dory at the mo', but we'd have been up s*** creek without a donor, more people like that fine upstanding man, Chris the W****r, are needed, believe me.
Well done mate.
H
PS that's why George Best is a complete, utter and genuine T*****r. Chris is just pretending.

[Nordic]

Top guy.

Someone I know is after a spare kidney, seeing the effect the waiting is having on him and his family I understand just how important these donations are.

[Doris]

OUCH!!!

It sounds like he's in for a whole heap of pain.  Who'd have ever thought such a horrible c**t was in fact a caring compassionate human being?

Send him all my best for a speedy and painless (well as painless as possible) recovery.

[Lorry]

Brave chap.  I thought they only took a spoonful

To (mis)quote Tony Handcock  - Two litres!  Thats an armful

[Steve Pyro]

Well done Chris,  first a sperm donor and now bone marrow - top man.

[Bob U]

Well done Chris, I always said you were a top man I never believed all those that called you a horrible c**t.

[Andy Zarse]

Well done Chris, you t*** you! Who'll be wearing the sick tee shirts next year then? Where did he get this sudden rush of altruism from, was he drunk?

Thanks guys, I'll pass on your best wishes. I dare say it'll help keep his chin up whilst they rev up the Makita 10mm SDS.

Was he drunk? Erm, yes I believe drink, and that other great male motivator, sex, was involved. It's a long story but it all goes back to his days at Surrey Uni, where one drunken night in the Union bar, he signed on to the Donor Program to impress a female who he quite fancied. Having had his wicked way, he neglected to take the necessary step of signing off the program. A basic error, and one which is about to cost him dear.

Anyway, fast forward ten years, and having completely forgotten about it, he was somewhat surprised to be contacted by the Anthony Nolan people asking him to come in to give a blood sample. He was told there was a low likelyhood he would be of any use to them, so was initially hopeful he wouldn't be needed. Anyway, it turns out he's a very good match and to his very great credit, he had no hesitation in saying yes.

Having said that, the sanctimonious bastard has being lording his moral highground over us and telling all and sundry in the pub "I'm saving a kiddy's life you know...". I mean smuggness, it's not a very nice characteristic is it? . I've told him I can't wait to use his hollow skeleton as a xylophone.

Anyway, all of Team Zarse are pretty proud of him, but when you see him next, don't forget to punch him in the pelvis!


Andy Z

[Bobblehat]

Good luck Chris, your a braver man than I.

[Perdu]

Good luck Chris, your a braver man than I.

Double ditto, well done.

[Lawnmower Man]

Well I have to take my hat off to you Chris.   After I gave my first Pint of blood I felt dead "superior". 

However,  You ARE Superior.

Tom.

[Brad Zarse]

well done chris....a little more faith restored in human nature....

Andy, Could you do us all the minor favour of supplying a link to said donor list please? 

I'm not suggesting anyone should do it or feel pressurised into signing up etc, but for those that feel the urge having seen Chris's example, the means to do so would be nice.

Personally - I suck at Blood giving, or anything which remotely involves a needle, but lets face it - we can all over come those fears when push comes to shove.

I am humbled by your actions mr zarse - i hope the operation is as painless as possible, and look forward to bringing my xylophone sticks to le-mans to see how many renditions of god save the queen we can get out of you before you collapse in agony 

[gab]

Respect...hats off to you Chris.

[hgb]

Ouch... very brave, my deepest respect.