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Author Topic: Monkey Trousers  (Read 6532 times)
Andy Zarse
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« on: June 28, 2005, 06:07:57 pm »

I am slowly getting back to normal, I've stopped wetting the bed and the shakes are subsiding. But I still keep getting attacks of the monkey trousers when I try to go to sleep.  Shocked

Is anyone else similarly afflicted?
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I wouldn't sit there if I were you, it's still a bit wet.
neilsie
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« Reply #1 on: June 28, 2005, 06:42:48 pm »

erm, no.... Roll Eyes Roll Eyes Roll Eyes
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Lorry
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« Reply #2 on: June 28, 2005, 07:00:54 pm »

I too am slowly getting back to normal, but what is an attack of "monkey trousers"?
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chrisbeatty
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Note to self, think of something witty.


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« Reply #3 on: June 28, 2005, 07:06:49 pm »

Has it anything to do with getting a visit from the beer monkey, little b**tard has been making regular visits in the last fortnight or so Smiley
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smokie
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« Reply #4 on: June 29, 2005, 12:23:45 am »

Erm...does spanking him help it die down at all???  Undecided
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Andy Zarse
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« Reply #5 on: June 29, 2005, 12:16:35 pm »

The monkey trousers? Surely you all know of the monkey trousers.  Huh

It's that trying to get to sleep problem after a week on the lash and I think it's caused by going (relatively) cold turkey. Just as you're nodding off, you get a terrible Jack Douglas-type twitch, a jerk of the legs, coupled with a terrible falling sensation. Your breath is locked inside your chest and you fight for air. You are compelled to sit up suddenly and let out a shivvering gasp, which sounds something like- "Arrrghh!-Brrrr!-Monkeytrousers!!" Then it's head down again to get ready for another dose of it ten minutes later.

I only ever get this after Le Mans or when my mate from Newcastle has been to stay for a few days, which is equally injurous to the liver.
« Last Edit: June 29, 2005, 12:18:55 pm by A Zarse esq » Logged

I wouldn't sit there if I were you, it's still a bit wet.
Lorry
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« Reply #6 on: June 29, 2005, 12:31:16 pm »

I'd see a doctor (but I didn't)  I just sleep it all off
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Lancs Se7en
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« Reply #7 on: June 29, 2005, 05:36:13 pm »

I'll bet this guy wishes that he was wearing something more substantial than monkey trousers


* that_hurts.jpg (34.18 KB, 358x480 - viewed 241 times.)
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« Reply #8 on: June 29, 2005, 05:41:53 pm »

Lack of fortitude there Zarse!!!

Need to put on a much better show old chap.  Ditch the monkeys and try something else  Grin
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Matt Harper
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« Reply #9 on: June 29, 2005, 08:30:07 pm »

The monkey trousers? Surely you all know of the monkey trousers.  Huh

It's that trying to get to sleep problem after a week on the lash and I think it's caused by going (relatively) cold turkey. Just as you're nodding off, you get a terrible Jack Douglas-type twitch, a jerk of the legs, coupled with a terrible falling sensation. Your breath is locked inside your chest and you fight for air. You are compelled to sit up suddenly and let out a shivvering gasp, which sounds something like- "Arrrghh!-Brrrr!-Monkeytrousers!!" Then it's head down again to get ready for another dose of it ten minutes later.

I only ever get this after Le Mans or when my mate from Newcastle has been to stay for a few days, which is equally injurous to the liver.

Quality.
Put's me in mind of "The Naughty Boy's Gorilla".
This phantom primate will often visit those who have over-indulged in the dead of night and do unspeakable things like screw up all your bank notes into tiny little balls and scatter them all over your bedroom, cooks an FEB at 2.00am and does a partial sh*t in your trollies.
In situations where you find yourself scratching your head head and wondering what the hell happened last night, it could be said that you suffered an attack from the naughty boy's gorilla  
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Andy Zarse
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« Reply #10 on: July 01, 2005, 12:09:41 pm »

Matt. They are both very naughty simians.

However, I'm convinced there's something very very wrong with me this time. I now can't seem to drink more than three pints without getting pissed out of my head and falling asleep, and my skin keeps going yellow in the mornings. Whilst I'm pleased to note the shakes and hallucinations have subsided, I'm beginning to think I might have seriously f**ked up my liver/pancreas/brain/other organs this time. I mean, it's going to happen at some stage isn't it? I can only put it down to the gallons of poisonously strong draught French beer I put away in Deauville on the sunday night. Anyone who has seen the excellent Ray Charles film will know what I'm talking about.
« Last Edit: July 01, 2005, 12:12:02 pm by A Zarse esq » Logged

I wouldn't sit there if I were you, it's still a bit wet.
chrisbeatty
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« Reply #11 on: July 01, 2005, 01:08:32 pm »

Andy, I'm slightly concerned that you can no longer drink more than 3 pints as I still seem to be able to neck plenty with minimal ill effects!!

I would suggest you go see a doctor, but they only give you pills, & not the ones you can sell off to hoody wearing street urchins.

Maybe the only medicine is a relocation to the Circuit de la Sarthe for the "medicin avec cidre", plus you'd get an excellent viewing spot for next year!! Grin
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wishy
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« Reply #12 on: July 01, 2005, 10:21:12 pm »

Well guys....!!!

All I can say,Is it has something to do with age,,,,,!!!

Three years ago at LM I tried to keep up with our twenty somethings that came to LM and I found that my liver and kidneys were not performing prpoerley for a week after ther event.....so these days.....I let the youngsters "BINGE 2drink and I look on in envy!!!!


I was young once!


Wishy
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« Reply #13 on: July 02, 2005, 12:55:31 am »

 Kiss Kiss Kiss

The yellow skin thing is because you have a secret penchant for St Tropez false tan and you were just trying to tell us.

You feel the need for the Carlos/Luinni look more than we first realised.

The mussy will be next I fear.

 Kiss Kiss
me
xx
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smokie
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« Reply #14 on: July 02, 2005, 01:24:25 am »


What kinda Friday night is that.....!

Fran

A usual Manchester one???   Undecided
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