Title: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Bob U on September 05, 2006, 10:54:15 am
Holy father of the ACO, please forgive me, I have sinned.
It has been 17 years since joining the Holy Order of La Sarthe and not once in those 17 years have I felt the need to confess.
Whilst on a pilgrimage to spread the faith in the far North, I allowed myself to become weakened and was seized upon by a band of infidels and unbelievers.
They plied me with their magic potions of Lager and Tropicoma and, whilst under the influence, they tried to make me denounce my faith and join them on their campsite.
I had to fool them into thinking I would join them and then try to make my escape at the earliest oppertunity.
Since that day, I have been overcome with guilt at my unholy thoughts and have had to travel to foreign parts to help me contemplate the error of my ways. Now, back in the bosom of my family, I have repented and must pay a volintary penance of drinking vast quantities of Kronenbourge 1664 and watching reruns of past pilgrmages
Please accept my confession and welcome me with open arms back into the campsite that is, God's Own Country
It has been 17 years since joining the Holy Order of La Sarthe and not once in those 17 years have I felt the need to confess.
Whilst on a pilgrimage to spread the faith in the far North, I allowed myself to become weakened and was seized upon by a band of infidels and unbelievers.
They plied me with their magic potions of Lager and Tropicoma and, whilst under the influence, they tried to make me denounce my faith and join them on their campsite.
I had to fool them into thinking I would join them and then try to make my escape at the earliest oppertunity.
Since that day, I have been overcome with guilt at my unholy thoughts and have had to travel to foreign parts to help me contemplate the error of my ways. Now, back in the bosom of my family, I have repented and must pay a volintary penance of drinking vast quantities of Kronenbourge 1664 and watching reruns of past pilgrmages
Please accept my confession and welcome me with open arms back into the campsite that is, God's Own Country
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Pieter on September 05, 2006, 11:15:47 am
So it's Maison Blanche in 07? ;D
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: fagey on September 05, 2006, 11:18:34 am
maybe Blue Sud with the locusts ;D
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Ferrari Spider on September 05, 2006, 11:23:53 am
Unfortunately, Brother Bob not only has he had to take a vow of silence he was also struck down with the red eye curse.
Many of you will know this as getting so pissed you're unable to take your contact lenses out which results in an eye infection.
I believe the miscreant has seen the error of his ways and will be more careful in future when falling into a den of footpads and thieves. ;)
Many of you will know this as getting so pissed you're unable to take your contact lenses out which results in an eye infection.
I believe the miscreant has seen the error of his ways and will be more careful in future when falling into a den of footpads and thieves. ;)
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Doris on September 05, 2006, 02:11:14 pm
Be at peace Bob. Never in all my years of pilgrimage to the Holy Land of La Sarthe have I felt the need to confess to changing campsites.
I do believe the Gods will accept your voluntary act of penitence and forgive your unholy thoughts as long as you stay true to the cause and continue to make the pilgrimage for many years to come.
Remember there are also rituals which, if adhered to whilst at La Sarthe, will aid you in your quest for forgiveness. Visitng the Stella Bar and The 'Stoning' of the TWATS being just two of these.
Stay strong, be true to the cause, and be at peace.
I do believe the Gods will accept your voluntary act of penitence and forgive your unholy thoughts as long as you stay true to the cause and continue to make the pilgrimage for many years to come.
Remember there are also rituals which, if adhered to whilst at La Sarthe, will aid you in your quest for forgiveness. Visitng the Stella Bar and The 'Stoning' of the TWATS being just two of these.
Stay strong, be true to the cause, and be at peace.
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Andy Zarse on September 05, 2006, 02:39:55 pm
Sinner! Fornicator! Idolator! Whore-monger!
Repenteth thee of thy filthy and unclean deeds eh? So shalt ye be cast out into the wilderness for a bit, where upon the devil will tempt thee with the sins of the flesh, strong liquor and a nice dooby. Yea verily I say unto thee, thou shalt pass through the valley of the damned and in an act of self-abnegation flay thy own back with a leather whip and maybe drop by Werner's for a pint or two on the way past. Then bathe thyself in the redemptive and cleansing power of MB and have a good nibble of the fatty calf old son. For is there not more joy in heaven at the repenting of a sinner than a rich man's packet of Camel or something?
Repenteth thee of thy filthy and unclean deeds eh? So shalt ye be cast out into the wilderness for a bit, where upon the devil will tempt thee with the sins of the flesh, strong liquor and a nice dooby. Yea verily I say unto thee, thou shalt pass through the valley of the damned and in an act of self-abnegation flay thy own back with a leather whip and maybe drop by Werner's for a pint or two on the way past. Then bathe thyself in the redemptive and cleansing power of MB and have a good nibble of the fatty calf old son. For is there not more joy in heaven at the repenting of a sinner than a rich man's packet of Camel or something?
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: BigH on September 05, 2006, 03:40:06 pm
Now Doris,
Is there something you need to confess to?
- Found this at the weekend.....
H
Is there something you need to confess to?
- Found this at the weekend.....
H
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: mgmark on September 05, 2006, 03:53:42 pm
....and in an act of self-abnegation.......
Andy,
Awesome - and it's only Tuesday - take an immediate award for being highly learned and for outstanding use of the language :o
MG Mark
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: fagey on September 05, 2006, 03:54:49 pm
can we have piccies?? ;D
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Doris on September 05, 2006, 05:15:21 pm
Now Doris,
Is there something you need to confess to?
- Found this at the weekend.....
H
Is there something you need to confess to?
- Found this at the weekend.....
H
Ah! That!
It's a bit embarrassing really. I was short of money and low on self esteem when a guy I knew said a friend of his was looking for models. He promised me the shots would be classy.
I'm not going to say I'm proud of what I did but....what?......Oh!.......Sorry, wrong photo shoot....
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Snoring Rhino on September 05, 2006, 05:38:12 pm
Was it anything to do with steve's influence and this photo shoot ?????????
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: fagey on September 05, 2006, 05:40:10 pm
so thats wher the ex wife ended up :o
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Piglet on September 05, 2006, 06:37:03 pm
Sinner! Fornicator! Idolator! Whore-monger!
Says the bloke with the Aston Villa avatar ;D
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Nordic on September 05, 2006, 06:43:01 pm
Well done brother Bob for being strong.
It is well known those of other lesser beliefs use powerful magic to intrance the unwary.
I have heard tell of the 'Golden triangle' and other horrid pox ridden areas that encircle the tranquil calm of the 'Annexe' but have only glimpsed them from atop the mighty wheel of the Sarthe.
Stay strong brother and wear some horse hair pants as penance and I am sure any lingering thoughts will be rid.
Brother Nordic
The monastry of the the Annexe, keeping thoughts pure and beer warm for twenty years
It is well known those of other lesser beliefs use powerful magic to intrance the unwary.
I have heard tell of the 'Golden triangle' and other horrid pox ridden areas that encircle the tranquil calm of the 'Annexe' but have only glimpsed them from atop the mighty wheel of the Sarthe.
Stay strong brother and wear some horse hair pants as penance and I am sure any lingering thoughts will be rid.
Brother Nordic
The monastry of the the Annexe, keeping thoughts pure and beer warm for twenty years
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Pieter on September 05, 2006, 06:56:28 pm
Now Doris,
Is there something you need to confess to?
- Found this at the weekend.....
H
Is there something you need to confess to?
- Found this at the weekend.....
H
Ah! That!
It's a bit embarrassing really. I was short of money and low on self esteem when a guy I knew said a friend of his was looking for models. He promised me the shots would be classy.
I'm not going to say I'm proud of what I did but....what?......Oh!.......Sorry, wrong photo shoot....
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Snoring Rhino on September 05, 2006, 06:58:18 pm
Heritics the lot of you.
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Perdu on September 05, 2006, 11:01:15 pm
I think yon Mr Zarse is strong in the force.
One day the plastic Ellises will fall off the wall of the Tony Barton Stand. Keep the faith!
So Bob, I think I will stay in Heaven's Hotel again next year then, I had feared that you were about to recommend a mass exodus to the "Other Place"
Brrrrr!
I even hope to convince Gary the bottle dropper to come along with me again...
;D
One day the plastic Ellises will fall off the wall of the Tony Barton Stand. Keep the faith!
So Bob, I think I will stay in Heaven's Hotel again next year then, I had feared that you were about to recommend a mass exodus to the "Other Place"
Brrrrr!
I even hope to convince Gary the bottle dropper to come along with me again...
;D
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: Brad Zarse on September 05, 2006, 11:59:08 pm
Sinner! Fornicator! Idolator! Whore-monger!
Says the bloke with the Aston Villa avatar ;D
Correction - Cheating Aston Villa Avatar....
I swear to god thier bloke went down easier than an amsterdam hooker and with far less grace the other week.....but he won't 'ave it!
We'll 'ave em at our place....
Title: Re: Forgive mw Father, for I have sinned
Post by: garyfrogeye on September 08, 2006, 12:57:49 am
<I even hope to convince Gary the bottle dropper to come along with me again...>
I'll consider myself convinced.
I'll consider myself convinced.
