Club Arnage

Is it me, but after watching Top Gear last weekend and their efforts of camping. Did it remind anybody else of an old episode of the Three Stooges.

Does that mean, Top Gear is the updated version of the Three Stooges?

If so who is who?

(http://www.voicechoice.com/images/3stooges.jpg)

Above picture is Larry, Moe, Curley

so TG would be : Hamster, Captain Slow, Clarkson

Wont bother watching top gear any more cos I find that it has got boring and so predictable that caravan gag was crap I thought top gear was suposed to be for car enthusiasts not a crap comedy show!!!!! >:(

That Top Gear show was appauling with the caravan! Who would tow a 1 tonne vehicle with a tow bar in that state!!!

Fifth Gear rules especially if you consider the presenters ;) I am not talking about Plato! He is a T*at like Clarkson.

Which presenters are you refering too then?? :)

Oh and be careful, I know for a fact that she looks in from time to time ;)

(http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y119/BradRWills/IMG_5869.jpg)

P.S - For the fact that I was completely twisted by this point and had been since the night before, you will forgive the uneven tie and open collar :)

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh vicky mmmmmmmm thats all I'll say  ;D

no accounting for some peoples taste i guess! :)

I agree, its shite.  The saga with the Caterham this week was just as bad.  I wouldn't trust that lot to build anyhing.  And you know its all staged.  Caterham's mechanics must have built the car, with a few prearranged shots of the 3 Stooges, plus the Stig being stopped by the law - obviously staged.

Complain now http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/

I'm not quite sure, but isn't it illegal to use a black visor on the public highway.

I agree the programme has gone downhill fast. More a compilation of "comedy" sketches now, I much prefer 5th gear.  Even the Woman helping with the seat tipping appeared to be staged. If the seats break that easilly what chance have they got with a bunch of kids in the back.
Give it up guys, It's passed it's sell by date

We have had three threads based on how cr*p Top Gear is. I have emailed them linking each of these threads to see if they actually give a damn about the people who pay their wages!

A fat lot of good that will do Rick. The BBC has a long history of ignoring viewers opinios. While it's true that you can't please everybody, (and I am sure that many people genuanlly enjoy Top Gear), it's the BBCs attitude to complaints that naffs me off.
They've been running Points of View for as long as I can remember and the format has always been the same, read the letters and then ignore them. Just think back to the smug bastards that have presented it over the years, Dale Winton, Anne Robinson, Wogan and Robert Robertson, all of them with the Cheesy grins and smug faces you would like to shove a branding iron into.
A programme that was supposed to give the licence payers a voice was turned into a platform for telling us how good they thought they were and for weak jokes at the viewers expence.
I'm afraid that Auntie Beeb is a law unto herself and by e-mailing Top Gear all that will be achieved will be a cheap crack at us by Clarkeson with not a chance of answing back

lets have a look at it logically guys ;)  I know that's something difficult for some of you.  This season is already in the can, so you can't change that, its the most popular car show in the world, can't change that, it has maybe another season left and it will finish.... for good.

Personally, I like it, its an hour of good fun, its light entertainment, un-pc to boot.  they have good/nice cars to do some fun things with them. 

I dont think this season is in the can yet Peter, I just registered for tickets for this coming Wendesday (although I dont know how far the are ahead with the broadcasts), but even I doubt wether they will listen to any constructive critisum - If only they would not try so hard to be funny, its not a comedy show and their not comediens (well not in the entertainment sense) it would be good it they were to get back to straight, objective and compartitve road tests.

Some of the video clips were in the can ages ago but the show is recorded earlier in the week of transmission, otherwise how would they get the topical news section in if it were pre-recorded weeks in advance? ???

I don't go along with the train of arguement that TG's a load of crap just because it's not the televisual equivalent of Autocar, (the controls fall easily to hand etc.) It's target audience love it, eg. people like me. It's eclectically-minded, iconoclastic and irreverent. That it is often very funny is a bonus, but it's usually just damn good sunday evening entertainment based around a petrolhead theme. OK the caravan thing was a bit weak, but that's no reason to fire off ill-thought-through emails saying how crap it all is. The team set a very high standard so occsaionally things will fail. I mean, what would you film instead? Yet another back to back test on the Vectra diesel? The build-a-Caterham thing last night was terrific IMO, boy did they not get shirty with each other.

To correct a terminalogical inexactitude, we have had not had three threads on how crap it is. We have, however, had three threads based on whether people like it or not, with supporters and detractors on both sides making some valid points. If you don't like it, fine, switch the fu-cker over and watch Big Brother on the other side. The statement about "we who pay the wages" is absolutely nonsensical. TG's made by an independent production company to a very tight BBC remit and which it is contractually bound to meet. It is the most watched prog on BBC2 so I guess they've got to be doing something that appeals to somebody somewhere. And if acting the Mr Angry of Tunbridge Wells applied to half the crap on the BBC we'd spend all day complaining.

Finally, no one will ever convince me that the extremely dull Pulling Power or the low budget wannabe Fifth Gear (they can't even come up with an original name!) are better options. Fifth Gear is a blatant copy of the old TG which ironically was axed by the BBC due to quickly shrinking audiences. Sure VBH is hot to trot and she's a pretty good TV girl too. But I wouldn't swap her for any of the three TG presenters. If you want to leer over her in some sort of grubby adolescent fantasy then there's plenty of pics of her on the internet, I mean, that's what it's there for.

Ian, I think there's something like a ten year waiting list for tix so good luck for this wednesday! And when you get back from seeing it made live, then tell me you'd rather have a test of the Kia Picante v the Hyundai Santa Fe instead. It will knock your socks off when you get there.

Ah well, probably not going then! But blimey Andy, you could never be accused of practicing plain English could you  ;D
My point is that the short one and the one with the girlie haircut always seem to be trying to out do Clarkson’s wit (which "CAN" be a bit self indulgent in itself) and often just make themselves look over enthusiasticly silly. Don’t get me wrong I do not dislike the program; it’s just difficult to take them to be funny when they try to hard.

Exactly what i was saying, the prerecorded stuff has been done for some time, the topical stuff is done nearer to transmission, it wouldn't be topical if it had been recorded months previously, now would it ;)

Just want to say i really like TG, as FS and Andy say it is a great way to spend an hour on Sunday night just before i go to the pub for sunday night pints.

They usually have cool cars and good tests of them, and i think if they went down the route of clinical tests on boot space and practicality etc it would be dull as and no one would watch it. All 3 presenters work well together and individually, if i am to be picky, the short one is the weakest. May is very funny indeed, "i do not run on TV" - "oh cock" etc, brilliant.

Even the funy sketches make me laugh out loud, the sailing boat herald and covertible espace works of genius. I don't find myself laughing so hard to many shows these days.

And they have done many classic sketches such as the Scaglieti (SP) racing to switzerland, genuinly tense and funny, great TV.

If BBC are reading this i say keep it up its one of your best shows.

And i went to see it last year being made, good day out, got the tickets through a mate who knows someone etc etc as tickets are like hens teeth and rocking horse sh*t if you get my drift.

I'm a TG fan and back what Andy etc have said earlier.

To those that have slagged it, I suggest you're missing the whole point of Top Gear.
The show really is a TV equivalent of a lads mag, with plenty of irreverant banter, slagging off and horse play - all taken very tongue in cheek with a very big pinch of salt.

There are one or two serious car features, however, these are predominantly of mid / high end sporty cars - exactly what the target audience wants.

Lets go back to my earlier comparison with a lads mag, say, Loaded.
Would Loaded run a 6 page feature on the fuel economy, load space and value for money of a Hyundai Getz?  My arse would they, they would feature a Ferrari Enzo and how many birds you could pull in an hour with one.
Top Gear is similar.

If you really want a 10 minute feature on the Hyundai Getz, I suggest Fifth Gear may be more up your strasse.

Alternatively, my mother says "Where the Heart Is" on ITV is quite good.  It's on on Sunday evening - at the same time as TG.

Just reach for the remote.

(http://micro-tech.telenet.be/Images/Remote control philips.jpg)

We get TG via BBC World over here in Germany and I quite like it. It's not a serious broadcast but fun to watch, the Espace convertible was just mentioned as an example.  ;D
And the scenes are a work of art, the filming director is a genius. They have such good sequences, that adds a lot to the appeal of TG because you don't see any such good filming in other car shows..
I remember the car/bike chase through Lissabon a few years ago to present the merrits of some shopping car was top notch. Btw, the car lost against the biker and some garden chairs went right to garden chair heaven.  ;D
Oh, and the Stig is fantastic too with the crap classic music playing in the background.  ;D

All excellent points made by Steve, Dave, Peter and Ian.  (edit; and HG) I think what we are all trying to say is that no one is obliged to like it, but simply accept it for what it is. If you want a programme dealing with comparative roadtests and serious topical motoring items, then there are alternatives already out there.

I must confess to being a regular viewer of Heartbeat, but mainly for the music and late sixties cars, bikes and heaven forbid, light commercial vehicles. Incidentally, did anyone spot the Commer that recently appeared in Emmerdale?

In view of obtaining a balanced opinion I elected to watch Fifth Gear last night in an attempt to compare it to TG.

Or at least I would have done if I hadn't slipped into a coma after about 15 minutes.

Now granted, I would l willingly bend Vicki Butler-Henderson ever the bonnet of any car (even the BMW 320 SI) but I fail to see why the main selling point of the car is that it can pull over 1G going round a corner. I'm not as petrol headed as most of you but my main enjoyment is driving fast in a forwards direction, something which the 173 BHP may have trouble doing.

And what did we get off the back of that? Basehead Plato doing handbrake turns in an Exige. Fantastic.

I think I may have switched over and watched Charmed then.

Say what you like about Top Gear, at least it's never dull. I don't like watching Fifth Gear so I won't watch it again. If you don't like watching Top Gear why not try the same.

Don't get me wrong, I am a fan of Clarkeson, I've read quite a few of his books and found them to be both funny and entertaining. It just seems to me that TG has gotten a bit stale since the last series, as Dave said it used to be a race to Chamonix or Somewhere in Sweden, now it is it has come down to racing a couple of Scallies.

 You have to admit that the caravan sketch was a bit "Carry on Camping" all that was missing was Barbara Windsors tits. I prefered it when they were jumping Volvo's over them or firing cars at them with a catapult.
 
Yes, I see the programme as a visual version of FHM or Loaded but they have months when the content is not up to the usual standard.

It maybe a case of too much of a good thing and I'm sure It must take a lot of imagination to keep coming up with new ideas. Surely the answer must be Quality not Quantity. All I said in my original post was I thought that TG was going down hill fast. I stand by that, I would also like to see it back after a break back upto the standard it was a couple of years ago.

A ten minute feature on a Hyundai Getz? Kinnel. I had one as a hire car last year and it took me a whole lot less than 10 minutes to realize it was a heap of rubbsh

I too thought about comparing the 2 by watching 5th Gear last evening. What is that VBH up to - squealing like an overgrown schoolgirl every few seconds (nothing wong with that in itself - but I prefer it in other material) and it gets a bit wearing after a while. Maybe trying TOO hard to appeal to the 'Loaded' demographic?

Apart from that I thought there were a couple of interesting pieces: Needell driving the Macca and the Enzo in the real world, although not particuarly informative about the cars (those watching would probably have read about them anyway) did give a sense about the practicalities, costs and usability of these exotic beasts.

Secondly -  (and here I slightly diverge with Robspot) the piece with Plato and the relative merits of car control vs aerobatic control - the stunt pilot I thought was a bit of a star. Mastering what Plato described as 'difficult' manouevres in a couple of goes max. was humbling, and even though I don't normally pay much attention to Plato his attempts at the aerobatic stuff were not too shabby either.

Tom Ford I just find pretty funny. His slightly shambolic style just appeals for some reason.

Going back to Top Gear for a sec. they are certainly running out of ideas and maybe trying way too hard to be 'entertaining' but I have an idea that would be a sure fire winner.

Get together all of the stuff that is recorded but not broadcast due to bad language, non-pc jokes,  p*ss taking etc. that goes on at the recording sessions and make a series of the out-takes. At the one I went to last year that would amount to about 80% of what Clarkson et. al. said, so there would be plenty of material for a couple of series.

It would genuinely be hilarious.

Saw Tom King, Fifth Gear, at LM this year, wonder if they have a feature planned.

Phwoarrr........i wish i had!  :P

Oh, great moment here. Mr. Zarse's finding a compromise.  ;)

c'mon guys............after all it is only celluloid!!!!!!

And in the darkest months it is ....what is classed as..............light entertainment ;D

I watched the repeat of TG last night just to be on the safe side. And you know what? You're right. It's scripted! I was so disgusted that I immediately switched over to watch Eastenders only to discover that the goings on in Albert Square are not real either, apparently the Fowlers are played by actors. And then someone told me that Fawlty Towers wasn't a fly-on-the-wall documentary of a real hotel. What a swindle! I mean, what's happenning to the world we live in? It's all so fake fake fake! Grrrrr!!!

Anyway, I'm sticking with the wrestling on a saturday afternoon. At least some things are real.

Yes Bob, actors. Like that Pauline Fowler woman who used to work in that Department store with the camp bloke who was always free and that other older woman who had a pussy. Anyway, apparently she packed up being a shop assistant and took up acting as a new career path.

That explains a lot I could never understand how a Scottish alcoholic bar owner in Eldorado turns up a year later as a Detective Sargent in Eastenders, naturally assumed he had gone onto the wagon and returned to normal life.

I hope Moderator Brown doesnt see this as an opportunity to drag out his Kendo Nagasaki and Mick McManus collection.   ::)

Various pics and stuff here Fran - http://www.britishwrestling.cwc.net/gallery.htm  ;)

(http://www.britishwrestling.cwc.net/haystac1.jpg)

(http://www.britishwrestling.cwc.net/kate3.jpg)

(http://www.britishwrestling.cwc.net/mcmanus1.jpg)

That Klondike Kate's a looker :o

Umm - thanks but no thanks Steve  :)

This thread kill Top Gear?

I thought there was a lot more, they talked about filming a lot in the USA, home of the Three Stooges.

I did'nt say I like it but it was getting more like a slap slick series!

I like fun stuff - mind you prefer Marxs brothers over the Three Stooges.