Club Arnage

Some funny adds, but unsuprisingly never published.
(hope our German friends wont be offended - none intended, I'm sure there are similar ones over there)

and...

Sehr gut mein Herr!

 ;D

KY Jelly - I can't believe it's not batter ;D

I notice you have omited the one about "Not for Schlossers, Wagners and K...tz! (Seriously, this exists!)

I liked the one with picture of Hitler, titled "Spot the ball competition"

its quite good beer too

Not an advert, but a great clip with a spitfire. Well it made me smile.

http://www.matthewfrancis.com/files/Spitfire_Pass.asx

Yes it is a good piece of footage, aircraft flown by Ray Hanna, now sadly departed, such a loss.  The commentator  Alan de cadenet, also a well know Spitfire owner and LM competitor.

You can get a book containing all these little gems and more from www.shepherd-neame.co.uk
Proceeds to the RAF Benevolent Fund

Yes that was part of the set..... but....

I admired your restraint!

I like this one!!

Andy ;D

And This one!!!

Andy ;D

Bit like my avatar that one, might have to change it...

Good idea, never been quite sure about the "Wife Beater" thing - assume you're not one? - Don't answer that!

Come on boys... lets see them!! :o

This ones not too bad either:

This is so bang-on Fagey!  I seem to remember one motor-racing journalist referring to the Probe as the Ford Penis.
Is this the thing with guys and long lenses too? ::)

Here's one

This is better.. keep em coming.. then we can sort a top 10 :)

Andy ;D

Try this http://www.flickr.com/photos/97986095@N00/191618782/

Now i like that :o..now we have some good old southern belles with their pickup off to see montoya in NASCAR :D

Andy ;D

Wow, now I feel thin again! :)

and there's more!!

Andy ;D

Andy, I think you got the same e-mail as me

Don't worry, I'm not.

Now then, how do you post pictures?

you mean like this one?? ;)

Andy ;D

Great thread guys, but if you're going to do a top 10 I reckon you have at least 2 categories here. Those Spitfire ads (believe it or not) actually were used - my ex-local pub in handcross had the full complement of beer coasters as well as posters above the bar (I've even seen one or two t-shirts floating around). This was around 2 years ago, and my favourite (not pictured above) is the one of Winston Churchill doing his V sign as if ordering 2 pints. Dead right btw, it is lovely beer!

So you have 2, maybe 3 categories for top tens:

Ads they dare not run
Ads they should not run, but did,
and maybe Ads that have 'improved' by a bored/disgruntled third party...

Well, you're right and your wrong, Steve.  Johnnie's in the Drink and Schlossers Wagners et al didn't appear although Victoria Cross certainly did.

I sure as hell miss the beer - a regular tipple for Saturday nights in the Peacock.

No comment re the above, I think!
Sheps also do a beach towel, bright red with the Spitfire logo and the words
"Have the Sunbeds, We're going to the Bar".  I don't work for them, honest, just love that!

See also http://www.twistedshorts.net/video/scrotum.htm

God bless America?

(http://www.adpunch.org/images/1jesus.jpg)

and voila!! another one ;)

Andy ;D

Sorry but this one really made me laugh...

(http://www.gagreport.com/Funny_Pictures/Spoof%20Ad%20Album/thumbnails/shark_tampax_jpg.jpg)

 ;D
(http://www.hodgedup.com/pics/pork-billboard-love.jpg)

A couple from years ago:

ANDREX Wipes the sh**t of your bottom and your finger won't go through.

NATWEST Students need a loan? Well f**ck off.

I agree with Fran :) Would be really stupid if a pic of an eye is removed  ;D

Here (http://www.miraen.com/humor/videos/funny_german_ad1.mpg)'s a Dutch commercial for a language learning institute. Was never released as an official ad, but did win a prize for originality in some contest or something.

 :-* :-* :-*

flippin heck you DfH people are good.

I reckon in a former life you were Scousers!

Lisa
 :-* :-*

And the Schneider beer!! ;D

Excellent Fagey - best graphic yet I reckon.
The eye is good - the Sexywebcam.com X and Erotico festival advert does lead you to expect to be looking at something else though, very clever

this one is very arty methinks ;D

one for the office workers...  :o

 :-* :-* :-*

Fagey

You were so born in St Ouen!

Jersey boy - through and through me thinks !

Lisa
 :-* :-\

St Ouen >:( never... I have heard of electricity and the wheel ;)

and I think I saw you again yesterday.. outside acorn finance/ viberts ;D

OH MY GOD! A REAL LIFE STALKER!

Jersey is like - way too small - for that type of carry on!

Why don't you just let me know what you drive and then I can stalk you!

Love

Lisa
 :-* :-*

me..stalker ??? maybe like chris the stalker walker on his bike ;D
its a dodgy mitsu gallant estate with a little jersey flag on it.. but was clocked at 139 mph by my mates RX8 on the way to LM this year ;D ;D ;D

Andy ;)

 :-* :-* :-*

on that note I will generally avoid the New Street area for most of the day.

If you need to stalk me today I am wearing a polka dot frock between 9-5 and then mostly  adopting a 'chav' look post 5pm in my Everton shirt!

Byee
Lisa
 :-*

So now it's a crapaud (Jersey) dating forum...

Get a life... move to Guernsey.

>Martini...

this is getting quite intriguing!

 :-* :-* :-*

Isn't it just - the thought that I am being actively stalked is weird and even stranger is the fact that I am telling  said stalker what I am wearing!

Lisa
 :-* :-*

me stalking!!.. nah,

just observant ;D and why would I want to move to guernsey?? smells of carrots and hay too much ;) and we got the Siam cup back ;D ;D

Andy ;D

Erm...I didn't see any eye so it went.  :-\

If someone would care to repost, I will review. Or we can just move one...  :)

It obviously was just in the eye of the beholder after all.

no doubt the moderators eye working overtime.  Still clouded by german beer. ;)

would that be the schneider beer ;D

We know a song about this don't we?

All together now...... Smokie gets in your eyes.

Sorry

Ouch.

any update on today? :)

only that its bleedin hot here today ;D ;D ;D ;D

any suprise there?  ;D ;D

not really.. as we are in the sub tropical palm tree lined channel islands ;D

 :-* :-* :-*

Nothing to update really - I am wearing dark glasses to try and avoid Fagey and have mostly stayed within the air con of my office building - so sorry - no stalker update as such.

I will be leaving on time this evening - so I will be sure to keep my wits about me lest i spot the Gallant coming at me at warp speed.

I will be wearing underwear though so don't panic!

Byee
Lisa

 :-* :-*

makes me sound like the bleedin scarlet pimpernel :'(

 :-* :-* :-*

Don't get upset Andy - if you do see me then please just say hello!

Actually - its raining now in tropical Jersey - so can I have a lift home?! I take back all I said about the Gallant!

I just wish the NSX was here :'( :'(

byee

Lisa

 :-* :-*

I was going to say hi the other day but was on the way to a meeting and you were gassing :D

next time will say boo  ;D

and what fun.. no car today.. just my R1 so sideways up westmount methinks 8)

Andy ;D

 :-* :-* :-*

tried Wesmount sideways a few times and not always in a voiture! :-X

Be careful though its a bit Damp (fnaa fnaa)

byee

Lisa
 :-* :-*

I came to your lovely Island as a Kid and it rained solid for to weeks........................ just thought I'd mention it.

Can anyone remember when the last time was an avatar was smoked?

Is that a ticking clock I can hear.

very artistic though

thought it was... hopefully get a few replies and I'll change it back tomorrow :o

Andy

Personally, it looks fine to me, you see more walking around the local town, its a shame they're false, but never mind. ;)

Yes they look a bit silonic dont they, abit more bounce needed, shame  8)

Personally, it looks fine to me, you see more walking around the local town, its a shame they're false, but never mind. ;)

Which local town is that FS?

I feel a visit may be in order ;D

Stand by ............

(http://www.questgraphicsdesign.com/clockanimation.gif)

Milford on Sea, very nice, very English South-Coast Holiday Town, http://www.milfordonsea.com/ :D

There's no 'l' in co... oops


>Martini...

Yup.. i think man made was the gist of it..  back to normal now ;D

Andy ;D

Phew!

What about this one ;D ;D


keep watching it!! :o

well done, it worked!

took its time and lots of effort :P

got there tho, and I think it will make people smile  ;)
Andy ;D

 :-* :-* :-*
yes - made me giggle but that is not difficult at the moment! ;)

Lisa
 :-* :-*

piddled are we.. ???

was a nice lunch at vecchia milano..but bleedin hot..the white wine got warm too fast ;)

Andy ;D

Love it! :)Said that and it's gone awol.  Shame :(

Just found this

how about this one :o

And which stupid fücker dared to call it a GERMAN ad  >:( Also someone who needs to learn hir/her languages

I did wonder about that when I saw the yellow numberplates, but assumed a Dutch person would know the right answer!!

No, I just know how to dodge it ;D

Fúcking f**k!  ::)

;D

The NL country sticker on the back of the car sort of gives it away as from the Netherlands.

Though I find this odd as most Dutch people have a good grasp of the british speak.

Oh f**ck, the f**cking f**ckers f**cked ;)

Touche!

The accent above the U

Where the f**k's the f**k*ng umlaut button on my f**k*ng computer?

next to your fúcking enter-button! >:(

;D

Hold down the Alt key and enter 129

Del

Potty mouths the lot of ya!  ::)

Is it about time we brought this lesson in Anglo Saxon English to a close?

(http://www.clubarnage.com/forum/Themes/classic/images/english/admin_lock.gif)

I see it more as a sort of IT tutorial.

And by IT I mean Information Technology, not IT

Then I suggest you try this instead -

(http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0001GU7DI.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg)

I wsih taht I had buohgt taht wehn I was lreainng to tpye ;D

Our local (very local indeed) radio station used to play an advert for a garden machinery store, at the end of the ad it said 'Open seven days a week,  including Sundays'  ::)

There are millions of ways around the swear filter (which is fairly tamely implemented). However it's there for a reason.

And while most people these days are not shocked by the f word, it's use in writing isn't impressive.

Please respect that, and save me the additional effort of having to update the banned word list (or maybe I should update the banned user list instead.....)

Thanks

ufck :-\

(If I remember in the morning I will remove the ban - but let that be a lesson to y'all!!!)


Ban lifted, welcome back Paddy  ;)

everyone give paddy a wave ;D


bet his companies profits will hit the roof though  ;)

For unusual characters on a PC, go to start -> run and then type in  'charmap ' then press
 Enter. Some are copy and paste and some are hold Alt and type a number on the number pad remembering to have the Num Lock enabled.