Club Arnage

Picked this thread up on 911uk.com, so I don't take any credit for it.
What's your vehicle history? Mine (I think), is this:-

Go cart
FizzieMk1 escort - daytona yellow, rostyles, tennis racket head rests!
Mk2 escort - light blue; I looked like local CID in it.
Mini Van
KX125 scrambler
Range Rover - handed down from my dad. a fortune spent on it, double sun roofs, spots, stereo, wheels etc and I put it in a ditch!
Mk3 Escort conv - I thought I was the nuts in that car. Looking back, I was a complete tool.
Dutton Phaeton
Orion - nasty company car
Nissan Bluebird - nastier company car
Beetle - resto job; lowered, EMPI's twin Webbers etc.
Audi 80 Quattro - bargain auction car, paid £4.9K at 3 years old. Did 135K in it and then someone smashed into it and wrote it off - paid out £3.1K. Cheapest motoring ever for me.
VW Split Screen camper - resto job again. Corking when it was finished.
Harley - '69 beauty
320is Beemer
Karmann Ghia Conv - resto job. No floor etc when I started.
Audi 80 Estate - getting sensible now !!
TVR Griffith - pre cat engine; the proper sounding one!
Kawasaki Streetfighter - home built from bitsa this and bitsa that
E300 Merc
Audi A6 Estate - still driving it
Triumph Speed Triple
Ford Ranger Pick Up
996 C4 - still driving it

I think that's it, maybe a few non descript efforts that could be added, but can't recall them. This amounts to 23 years of driving.

God, I've wasted some money on vehicles!!!

Come on, what have you owned? Remember, the embarrasing ones too (see Bluebird and Orion above).

Mini 1000cc (nasty brown colour with a white roof)
Vauxhall Nova 1.2 'Swing!'
Tiger Super Six. Pinto then Zetec powered. Made one trip to Le Mans in this.
Renault Clio 1.4RT
Subaru Impreza WRX Ra. Kept this for 7 years - I don't even want to know how much petrol went in this!
Tiger R6. 200bhp Zetec in this one. This did one LeMans trip too.
Tiger Z100. A nice quick one! This is making it's 3rd LeMans trip this year
Seat Leon FR TDi. Smelly diesel thing that doesn't cost the earth to run!

37% of this lot have been down to LeMans!

Call me Mr Pedantic, but thats only 2.96 cars. Is it the rounding?

37.5% then  ;)

That's better.

My driving history includes an Austin Maestro City and the Commer. Enough said.

Escort Mk1 1300.
Escort Mk2 RS2000 Pale blue, v reg, single box Janspeed system. great car for a 20 year old.
Toyota MR2 Mk1. sold in 94, not owned a car since.

But have had the pleasure of various company cars including, 2 x rover 216's, 2 x Seat Toledos, BMW 3, 3 Ford Escorts & a Renault Traffic van.

Mini 1000 in Burgundy red - Written Off by my sister
Ford Fiesta 1100 in metallic  green, written off by me 18 days after test
Volvo 340DL in white - Thirsty Beast
Ford Fiesta Festival in red, travelled the UK in it.
Rover 214sei - Travelled Europe in it. Best car yet, 100% reliable
Westfield 2.0i 16V VX AStra GS2000 Ecotec 3 lumo, in yellow - Sold after 1000 miles
Yamaha Xj400s, blew engine after 6 weeks of ownership
Kwak ZZR600 E - In purple. Awesome motor, Very fast, bad with corners
Honda CBR600 FX -  Still got it. Awesome bike, Done Europe already
MG ZS TDi - Ace carm but named The Tractor as its loud.
Mini City 1000e with 1.3 Turbo lump ( still in resto pieces )

And today...

Suzuki AP50 in need of a little TLC.
 

Ford Escort mk 2 - passed my test in it!
Ford Cortina mk 3 - 1300 cc's of growling death
Vauxhall Cavalier mk 1 - with go faster stripes on the side
Triumph Spitfire 1500 - great topless fun car - now gently decaying in the back of my garage - a LONG term project
Vauxhall Cavalier mk2 1800 SRi - used to think it went like stink until.....
Pontiac Firebird Trans Am (1976 model) - kicked serious bottom (car rusted to nothing but engine and transmission lives on in the cobra)
Cadillac Coupe DeVille (1962 model) - fins and HUGE thirst - but could comfortably seat 7 on bench seats plus a family of refugees in the trunk
Kawasaki GT550 - threw me down the road on more than one occasion
Kawasaki EN500 - posy custom tourer
Pontiac Fiero (1984 model) - mid-engined plastic / fibreglass 2 seater
Chevrolet Camaro (1998 model) - modern 'F-Body' 2+2 with glass removable T-top roof .
Dax Tojeiro (cobra replica) with aforementioned Pontiac power - 5 long years of hard graft in the garage and saving money! - STILL GOT IT  ;D - Appears annually in Houx Annexe.

plus various company hacks - Ford Escorts, Ford Focus, Vauxhall Vectra (old type), Vauxhall Vectra (2004 model) 2.0 petrol turbo - satisfies my need for speed when not in the cobra.

.......and a ride on lawn mower........with a 12 HP engine  8)

Austin Metro 1.0 City - which i sold to my sister (http://cybergifs.com/faces/L-O-L.gif)
Peugeot 306 1.6 lx - which i wrote off
Rover 100 'Ascot' - a new metro

A couple of others that have come to mind -  

V-Max - Loon machine, de-restricted, quick shifter, NO2. How could I forget it. Toured to Spain on it; interesting with a 100 mile range in the tank! Took on the Mulsanne on it,!!!
Oldsmobile Toronado - not my car, but my dads. i used to drive it once I was old enough. 28 foot 6 inches long, 15 seats, 4 doors down each side. The whole rugby team used to go to the game in 1 car.
Yam XS250 - in complete desrt rat livery. Full camo, shovel, jerry can and mock machine gun. £400 of laughs.

I'm sure there are more.....

First car I dove
Hillman Minx - In a lovely grey with red plastic seats, very hot in summer!
Learnt to drive in
Alfa Sud 1.3 - Green and rusty but fantastic
MG Metro - more rust
Renult 19 Turbo - What!!!
Failed test :( Got bike
MZ125 - (OK not realy a motorbike isit!), used to ride from Buckingham to Ipswich, I was young a foolish, skint, didnt know about motorbikes! Crashed it into a Micra, did a lot of damage to Micra
1st Car
Brown Mini Clubman - well the missus car realy
Polo GT - quite good fun
Morris Marina - My god I had one of those! Started to smoke so I abandond it.......I dont realy care were it is
MGBGT - Red and drove it alround Scotland
Mini Cooper - Well it looked like one, total c*ap
Volvo 360 GLS - Was the old mans gave it to me after it spat him of a roundabout then Spat me of a roundabout. The worst thing I ever drove
Ford Serria 2.3D - The M40 stormer
Morris Minor 1000 - 2 door in blue, I wish I never got rid of it will have another
Peugot 306 GLD - Carried a lot of wine
Ford Mondeo Estate - carried more wine - brock the back suspension too much wine!!!
Reliant Scimitar GTE SE6 - still have it, converting to a sprint and hillclimb car, yippee
LDV Cub - slow ugly but carries a lot of wine,
Omega - big blue barge, pleanty of room for kids luggage, and gets to Italy in comfort. But very dull

My I have driven some rubbish havent I  

i forgot to mention the company astravan, plus the countless hire cars

my 'crash' list is far more impressive tho -

metro #1 survived 2 crashes,
my pug survived 2 crashes and i killed it at the 3rd attempt,
my astravan survived 1 crash, but the cambelt went so technically i did kill it aswell,
and i also crashed a ford fusion hire car the day i got it, it only had 500 miles on the clock

Honda XL 125 S Trailed the whole of Yorkshire/peak district
DT 175 MX - Shite
GPZ 500 – f**k*ng BRILL
Mini Metro – my mums smashed it up twice for her
MK 1 Escort
MK 2 Escort 1600 sports with FF1600 head on, brilliant to 60 mph then that was it
Austin Allegro – sh*t brown colour best seats ever
Fiesta 950
Fiesta 1100
Rover Maestro Blue – company car which I blew up so the bastards got me a red one
Have had the last laugh they were bought by an American firm and the pension scheme is f**ked
Astra 1.3 – company car smashed that twice
Ford escort 1.3 popular plus – Company car smashed up along the fronts of four houses – bastards made me redundant
Ford Escort Popular Plus as a replacement whilst serving redundancy notice
Transit pick ups various
7.5 tonne Lorries various
Nissan Primera estate in white still to this day I don’t know why
406 diesel very good really did what it said on the tin
Renault Laguna 2.2 dci sh*t dealer service but done 70000 in less then two years so not bad

Mk1 Cortina, Metallic blue, Purple fish scale flashes down the side and silver lace work on the bonnet - had a final meeting with a goat that ran out of a church - both died and my destiny is probably in hell.
Anglia 1200 - no floor.
850 Mini - reputably had Keith Moons 10" steering wheel on it ??
Triumph Vittesse 2ltr Mk2 - like the Forth Bridge started rebuilding at the front by the time I got to the back the front was knackered again! but sounded great with a Peco exhaust on it.
Beetle 1500 (got married)
Vauxhall Viva 1800 (Bradley arrived on the scene)
VW golf 1500
1275 mini
Sierra 1600 (first Co Car)
Cavalier
Cavalier SRI
Rover 414 (demotion)
Mondeo 2ltr SI
Audi A4 Avant
Honda Accord (last Co car)
Audi A4
VW Passat TDI (50mpg !!!)
MG Trophy (for sale)
TVR Chimera 4.5 Met Green, absolutly gorgeous - apart from the rust in the chassis, mine for 45 minutes :'( :'( :'(

1978 ? VW Golf 1500 GLS - Metallic Burgundy , paid £580, crashed 3 times and then sold for £350,

1988  Ford Escort 1.3 Popular , Burgundy - Bag of shite .

1990 Peugeot 405 Mi16, white 4 years old paid £4000 for it, great car, handled well in dry but crap in the wet. Good for 135mph on the way to Donington with a full boot and 4 people on board. Had to go when i spent £1200 in 6 months on it. took it to Le Mans in 1997 on my own. Made the 285 mile trip back from the ferry in 4 hours and passed Tom Walkinshaw in his TWR Jag on the M40 at over 100mph.

1992 Rover 420 SLI, White, not bad car really.

Rover 414i - Lease car via work for 2 years, trouble free motoring at £214 a month. But still had to run around for 3 months with the speedo and clock disconnected to keep the mileage under the agreed limit.

1990 Audi Coupe 2.3 20V, white. Lovely car and owned it for 4 years. Very well built and solid, fast but drank petrol, so it had to go in favour of a diesel.

1997 Audi A4 TDi Quattro. Owned since July 04. White, sports suspension and seat and trim etc, air con. Bought from round the corner on the next street. paid £5600 for it.

Had it three weeks, when a silly woman driver pulled out in front of me at a junction without looking and i t boned her in the door and wrote off her Pug 205. Although I hit her at only 15 mph, it did damage that cost approx £4000 to repair and took 6 weeks.  But the car i got back was better than the one I had bought 3 weeks before the accident, all new parts and the air con now worked ! Bonus.

Thats my history, 1990 to 2005.

1965 309e Anglia Van - Was going to turn it into a Gasser, got the engine out and the front suspension off when money and ability ran out (I was only 16) - Scrapped
1966 Mustang Hardtop 3.2 litre straight six - gave that up after my father stopped paying the £900 TPFT insurance (I was 17)
1948 Austin Somerset - According to Swansea this is still registered
1960 BSA C15
1980 Yam XS250SE factory custom thingy
1970 Volvo 142 Wallowed like a pig on rollerskates
1973 Cortina 2 litre GL, leaked like a sieve and had several varieties of mushrooms growing out of the upholstery
Honda VT500 With covered discs on the front, a solution to a non existant problem
Kawasaki GT550 The one that I had my crash on
Mk3 Capri Wide arches, Revolution wheels - a real chav car
Rover SD1 2300 A true slug
2 Mk2 Granadas One an L with a Ghix X interior
Opel Manta B - Died on the A12 after breaking the oil pump drive, a real loss, lovely car
Volvo 740 Estate
Cavalier 2.0 SRI - Fast,for what it was. Got let off a pull at 115 on the A30 in that, sold it shortly afterwards
Mondeo
1960 Ford Zodiac Will become a gasser over next winter

Full circle..

Steve, it's interesting to see that you've been thrown off a Kawasaki GT550 as well - bloody courier bikes  >:(

Being the youngster and a student that i am. My driving history seems almost non-existent in comparison to some of you older members of the forum.

2000 Vauxhall Corsa 1.0 I drove it till it died. It made two trips to Le Mans

2004 Alfa 156 1.8 - Having a wail of a time with this

Well thats me - I don't suppose you can include a 49 cc Mini Moto.

The cars my dad has had and has let me drive is far more impressive. The best being a Jag XJS C V12. Brilliant fun, if only it wasn't an automatic.

BEDFORD HA VAN Dads company runaround, learnt to drive at age of 11 on farm tracks, had crashed it before my 12th birthday, still have scar on shin.
FORD CORTINA 1500 GT. Pre 17 project, never finished, sold and reshelled a lotus
FORD ESCORT MEXICO MK1. Another unfinished project
FORD ESCORT MK2 HARRIER. Passed test in this rot box
FORD ESCORT 1600 SPORT. another rot box but with nice plate ODK 1R
ALFA SUD SPRINT GREEN CLOVER LEAF
FORD ESCORT RS 2000 CUSTOM. A real minter with low mileage, ended up to full group 4 spec with atmo cossy engine and 5 link back end. Sold when I had to insure it myself, i was only still 18!
ALFA SUD 1500
TALBOT SUNBEAM Ti. My 1st rally car, sold to rally school near York
OPEL KADETTE G/TE. Rally car number 2, ended its life and nearly mine in a yorkshire forrest 40 metres down an enbankment
2 MORE ESCORT RS MK2s
ALFA GUILIETTA 2000
BMW 520 E28 Still have this one, 360,000 miles and still going strong-ish
1990 SAPHIRE COSSY
1962 MERCEDES BENZ 220SE FINTAIL
BMW 320 TOURING rattly bag of sh***
1964 MERCEDES 200 FINTAIL
72 MGBGT, rusty bag of sh***
64 CORTINA MK1 DELUX
76 ROVER P6 2200TC
84 GINETTA KIT THINGY-HORID
89 SAAB 900 T16 AERO
72 SAAB 95 ESTATE
70 SAAB 96 V4
ANOTHER 64 MERC FINTAIL (still have this one, undergoing a 7 year restoration)
2 x VOLVO 240 GLT ESTATES bombproof and very sideways.
LADA RIVA GRP B RALLY CAR WITH FIAT TWINK very quick cheap motorsport
about 20 different SAAB 900 TURBOs, good reliable cars that i always make a profit on come sale time
1970 SAAB 96 V4 RALLY CAR full works spec but with single carb motor, Now sold on - I believe that a certain member of this forum made his motorsporting debut in this car earlier this year
1976 SAAB 99 TURBO My daily driver and up past 200BHP with front wheel drive and no power steering, a proper misters car!!
another MERC FINTAIL 200 arrived last autumn
2001 MERCEDES V-CLASS
1988 PEUGEOT 205 GTI The red one of Coronation Street that Tyrone drove, currently in workshops being rebuilt as a 205 challenge rally car.
PHEW i can already think of about 20 others and thats without the company runarounds, i think i will leave it at that

I think they were designed to cull couriers :)

I am another Team TickleTheDragoner
1968 Mini 1000. Broadsided it on the ice once in a lane and there was no room left to three point turn it out of the gap.  Very embarrassing. Great car, just a bad driver.
1983 Astra van.  Surprisingly quick and used to terrorise my biker mates in the wet.
Fiestas (x3)
Mk 2 Escorts (x2)
Mk1 Mexico until some git stole in in Shepherd's Bush
Mk2 Mexico with RS2000 engine, 40s, 4 branch etc, etc. Fantastic car.  I want it back.
Various Cavaliers (4 of I think, plus an Astra). Unremarkable except for the SRi that was used in a navgiational rally with 400 miles on the clock and ended its life throwing a con-rod on the M11 one gloomy February night.
Montego (joint worst car I ever owned)
Volvo 340 GLE 1.7 (the other half of the joint worst)
2 Sierras
Mondeo (x2)
Carlton Estate.  Central locking a pain in the derrier.
Golf GL 1.8.
BMW 320i.  When they wag their tail in the wet they mean it.  Had the scariest spin in it.
Volvo 740 Estate (great, tough tank)
Ford Galaxy.  Lots of trouble, very practical.
Mercedes E220. Started my passion for Mercs.
Mercedes 500SE (wonderful).
Mk1 Facelift Capri used as a sprint car with a 3.1 engine.  To get a Rover engine but the money keeps running out.
Citroen (practical....)
Corsa (cheapest car to run I have ever seen)

Am I boring you yet?  There are probably more that I have forgotten.

Well here goes then....

Roughly in chronological order from when I was legally allowed on the roads:

Casal SS4 Moped - Quicker than it's contemporary the FS1E but no street cred. Just different from the herd.
Suzuki Hustler 250 - Fast and furious and no-one could see you from behind due to the 2 stroke smoke. Wish I had it now - apparently a bit of a classic! It would have killed me eventually though.
Vauxhall HB saloon - first (but not last) crap car.
Triumph Herald 1200
Triumph Spitfire MK3 1300 - My first (and last) taste of classic British open top motoring.
Austin Allegro 1300 - yes that's right, and in a light battleship grey colour too! Can't think of a good excuse - but needed the transport.
Renault 16TX - lovely and cosseting for it's time, and individual to boot. Electric everything - but a bit prone to the gremlins. I once went into an auto car wash with the windows down, set the car wash going then the window fuses went....
Ford Escort 1300GT - Rebuilt and fitted with a 1600GT engine and a few other mods. Did a bit of night navigation rallying for a while but my navigator was crap so gave up.
Triumph Dolomite Sprint - Again tuned a bit (almost 200BHP). Did a bit of sprinting and hillclimb but sold it to placate the (now long ex) missus.
VW Polo - bit of a come down, but necessary interim transport.
Peugeot 205XS - a return to things slightly more sporting.
Peugeot 205GTI - A little bit more sporting.
Peugeot 309GTI - spot the theme??, but with slightly more benign handling than the 205. Used on many a track day. Sold on to other family members and is still going to this day, some 14 years after it's creation.
Subaru Impreza Turbo saloon - Modified here and there (mainly handling upgrades). The most enjoyable 4 seater I've ever driven, and enjoyed for the last 5 years from new. Up for sale now though as my next car is due for delivery soon.
Nissan 350Z - Due late May, so not strictly history, however just in time for this year's trip - can't wait.

A couple of company cars in between the above list somewhere, but not worthy of mention - unlike the Allegro.

Citroen AX GT (bought for £750, spent £2000 on fixing it, it died again and I sold it for £100.  Not my best buy that one!)

Vauxhall Corsa 1.4 Sport (thats sport as in cricket or bowls or curling)

Mitsubishi FTO GPX (My first V engine  8) ;D   Also my current drive)

Any nutters fancy adding this to their list http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=2192&item=4538358378&rd=1   :-X :-X

The Rickmeister bought one of those last year with a view to a bit of 'modifying'.  AFAIK it was subsequently flogged on (or ritually burnt).

I've been giving this a lot of thought and hummed and harred about boring  you lot with the list.  But thinking back to each car has been fun, so here goes.  For the sake of completeness I've included the wifes cars as well -

The list is roughly in chronological order.

VW Golf - was the wifes and became our first car
MGB GT - wire wheels and chrome bumpers, got married in it, put a new engine in it as well, can't see the attraction
Capri 2.0 Ghia - the custard coloured one with a vinyl roof, great car until Mrs left the dogs in it and they ate the seats
Mini clubman - wifes
Cavalier SRI - made our first trip tp LM in this, great car
Scirrocco GTX - one of my favourite cars, picked up the our first son and Mrs from hospital in this
BMW 323i - first car I got stopped in on way back from LM....and got let off, nice car but would have prefered a manual
Fiat127 - wifes, bought it off an Italian when we got it home and opened the boot we found his wifes dildo by the spare wheel !
Escort RS Turbo - blue one, went like the clappers but was too small
Saab Turbo 900 - lovely, solid and reliable
Fiat Panda - wifes, no dildos this time
BMW 318i - not bad, but not exciting
Sierra Cosworth - fantastic car, but sadly ammassed 11 points in this beauty so it was replaced by a car to calm down in
Volo estate 740GLE - loads of space and qucik too
VW Passat - wifes
LandRover series 2 - great fun, you could lift a lid a see the road
Nissan Patrol - wifes, great big thing with gold wheels !
BMW 318is - liked this a lot until I wrapped it around a tree in the wet
Saab 9000 CSE, got this cos I was sh*t scared of getting back in a beemer, Saab was good though with a great stereo
Range Rover - wifes
BMW 520i - not bad but a bit slow
Discovery ES - wifes, went to France with whole family in this plus 4 bikes and a roof box ,  greta time
BMW 528i - brilliant, fast comfy and looked the bollocks
BMW 840i - awesome, full M Tech body kit, loved it.
Audi Allroad, heavy on the juice, but good all the same
Porche 996 Carrera 2, Silver with full GT3 bodykit and sports exhaust, you heard it before you saw it. My first Porsche, it was a real wrench to see it go, so much so that I nearly turned back on the way to the dealer.
Audi A4 3.0 quattro - cost the sameas an M3 but went and handled far better
BMW 745i - worst car I have ever had, must have gone back 20 times for repair
BMW 730d - went as fast as the 745 but used less jice and was reliable too
Range Rover - wifes
Audi Avant RS6 - current daily driver, never a dull moment and can't think of anything else out there to top it for what it does. Having new brakes at AMD Biscester next week, thinking of doing the upgrade to 500bhp....£1800 hmmm.
Porsche 996 Turbo - I've had this since February and is the only car I've been in that makes the RS6 seem slow. It does exactly what it says on the tin !

Hope I did'nt bore you guys too much,but its been fun trying to remeber them all.

Cheers

Jem

Bored myself writing mine and just couldn't be arsed to type it out.
Rusty