Club Arnage

This from her Ladyship this evening after a day of LMES and BTCC:
"For f***s sake stop talking about f*****g Le Mans. The sooner it's over for this year the f*****g better! I'm sick of hearing about Maison f*****g Blanche and poxy barbecues."
"Give it a rest for f***s sake"

Well really!

Does anyone else get this grief??????

Lord Steve

Hmmm, sounds familiar.

I only got a weekend pass to Pre Quals as I was supposed to be working away near Dover  :-\

Me Lord

Seems to me I'm getting a bit of the old deja vooouuuussssemondo here.

Rules are dead simple....keep shchtum until 10minutes before you are about to leave.  Make sure you've got all the gear ready well in advance so she can't see you packing (I know packing is exciting, but I always find the old rugby sock in the garage trick quells the problem and reduces the swelling somewhat)

So then on the day of departure all you need to worry about is draining le bollocks and away you go.  If its not toooooo impertinant Me Godship, seems to me like you are making every schoolboy error in the book!!!!!

Seems to me we need a chat a la Friday in the square  !!!!!!


Be good

Jem

Develop yourself some unsocial nocturnal habits. I have, and it works.

I got a pass to Sebring, and a positive command to go to pre-qual. Today she was bemoanng that the main event is still a few weeks away.

I snore very loudly (don't I Phil?).  I also talk, sing and fart in my sleep, and it only gets worse (some may say better!) after a few bevvies.

So it's fortunate that my co-hab at LM, Mark, sleeps even more deeply than I.

Sound advice gents. Jem, might actually make it in the square on Friday after 10 years trying. Normally too absorbed in watching "Shaggy" flag down Caterhams on the road adjacent to MB. However, the movement of the big concrete wall next to the road might scupper that.

Whats the Friday plan then???????

Beer - Curry - Bretheren?

Steve

Hi Smokie,
                I have never heard you snore. ;D I told you I can sleep through anything ::)
Canada Phil

Surely much easier to pretend you have to attend your company's sales conference in Bangkok for a week?

Steve - nicely done sir!


Lord Steve - Yes, but it the way that it is managed that is important.   My missus works shifts which helps uniterrupted viewing.   However, when viewing requirements and her being off-shift coincide, then multi-tasking is the answer - you get to enjoy beer, enjoy the racing on TV, but then by doing something else productive at the same time, like the ironing mountain.   Might seem a pain, but you gain massive kudos and brownie points, which offsets the grief about disappearing to France for a week.

STOP wigning about your little problems. I present you the worst case scenario (which I am currently living). My wife is about to give birth to our second child and I'm quite sure that  she's just holding her legs crossed until it'll be too late for me to join you lot at the yearly Beer, Burp and Fart Festival.

Please Advise .............................

[attachment deleted by admin]

Dear COLD BEER GUY,

A little word of advice/question (albeit stable doors and bolted horses spring swiftly to mind) but what the feck possessed you to have sex between August and October?????? Didn't you think it thru man??? Jeezz!!!

Congrats/commiserations by the way......

 ;D

Birthing in June.......sends a cold shiver down the spine, congrats anyway.

Lord Steve, standard itinerary for Friday goes along the lines of -

Wake up, check for injuries sustained from falling off wall outside Terte Rouge bar the night before.

Take resolve.

Open red bull, add vodka.  Light Marlboro.

Cook pig and place in bread,  eat.

Wash

Open more redbull and vodka......

Wander over to bus stop past museum late morning.

Establish base camp at bar opposite Mcdonalds, preferably in shade but on edge so as to afford easy access to bog, beer, Mcdonlads etc.

Stay in square until dusk

Head off for curry

Taxi back to Le Breth bash late evening

That sort of wraps up Friday.

Cold Beer Guy,
What the HELL is going on in that paddling pool????
(Looks like Iraqi prisoner humiliation).

Tell her you love it when she talks dirty.

I think he's demonstrating how she got pregnant??

The answer is starring you in the face. Surely it's a natural birthing pool. Hey presto, problem solved.

Talking about dedication to the "Grande excursion" Vicky my mate Stuart's wife has booked an early visit to the theatre for a cut 'n 'shut job in the next week or so. Just so that he can accompany us to LM for his first time.  Must be love!
 ???


Bill

A few answers:
-everyone should have sex in those months, just be careful with who.Well I tried to avoid it but little beer guy doesn't keep a calendar!
-We don't need Iraqies to humiliate, we usualy do it to ourselves (humiliation that is).

But in humiliating ourselves, we're not alone ... WHO CAN RECKOGNIZE THESE FURRIE GIRLIES ??

[attachment deleted by admin]

just a few comments as late as they seem.....

Jem, same routine then but another year, and whats this about low fat marlies?

the way to wake a Mouse in the middle of the night is to mutter the word COFFEE, then off for a trip arround the circuit!! It will happen this year Mouse.

And lastly dont bother with the butter her up and bull sh*t, tell her you are going, full stop. For fecks sake who wears the trousers.
As was mentioned earlier, "dont forget to empty the bag before you go!

Hi Andy,
 Can I sign up for the Coffee and a ride?
Canada Phil

Perfect solution:

Make sure her Mother moves to Wales, live in Somerset, keep the contact to phone, so by the time January comes around and "I can't wait for June" gets mentioned, she will reply "Yes, it will be nice to spend a week with my mum"  PROBLEM SOLVED!!!

Mnd you she has come along to LM 4 times and has been a great laugh and not cramped my style in the slightest!

To keep this topic off track - can someone answer what this Dutch kid was doing in the plot next to us on Beausejour a couple of years ago????



[attachment deleted by admin]

Can't put names to the "faces", but I do remember watching the array of burnt a**es last year, through a haze of Stella, and the harmony of a Ducatis and a Triumph triple on the rev limiters, courtesy of the Brethren - an outstanding evening!

From the look of that picture, it will need names to faeces

I think that was the year DeWalt sponsored the Morgan team and the yellow and black colouring is a give away. This is a genuine hand crafted Malvern anal inflator, called an Aero 8. I can't say for sure where the length of string comes into the equation, but maybe think Minotaur?

Phil, you are signed up buddy. that is on the agenda this year. we have less in the crew to be bothered about the night journt.

That photo is gonna get some sick stick soon, i bet a beer or three on it.

I think he's blowing up his dinghy having heard how large The Liverpool Boys swimming pool will be this year!  ;D

Mark,
          RS2 appears to have gone to ground so the pool may have to be downsized, watch this space..

She's probably still swooning from when Johnny signed her CA t-shirt.

Or they are stuck at the port without a car because she left both cars' lights on!!  ;)

Thanks to the T.W.A.T's for their unique floor show at the Friday night Brethren Bash. Sadly they were unable to sync the flames from there arseholes with the flames coming out of the bikes . Would have been a special sight.
Maybe a couple of phalls each would have given the required gasses and back pressure.
Better luck this year.
Rusty