Title: Haynes
Post by: gibberish on January 19, 2004, 05:02:42 pm
I just caught sight of the Sun newspaper on a colleagues desk. Headline says that haynes have produced a manual about sex :o
Someone please tell me they are joking, or I'm seeing things, or something...............PLEASE
Someone please tell me they are joking, or I'm seeing things, or something...............PLEASE
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Ruptured Duck Motorsport on January 19, 2004, 06:50:30 pm
No joke....
Haynes own site - section on the new manual (http://www.haynes.co.uk/sexmanual.asp)
Haynes own site - section on the new manual (http://www.haynes.co.uk/sexmanual.asp)
Quote
The SEX Manual - Sex and cars have been inextricably linked for years, and it will come as no surprise that a large proportion of all sex takes place in cars. So what is more logical than a Sex manual from Haynes?
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Robbo SPS on January 19, 2004, 09:03:00 pm
I always thought they got a car / engine / bike stripped it and then toojk photos of bits you never see, write about them being really easy to undo and put back together properly.
How on earth do they do that with a woman :-[ :'( :-\
How on earth do they do that with a woman :-[ :'( :-\
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Mr. Rick on January 19, 2004, 09:13:49 pm
I always thought they got a car / engine / bike stripped it and then toojk photos of bits you never see, write about them being really easy to undo and put back together properly.
How on earth do they do that with a woman :-[ :'( :-\
How on earth do they do that with a woman :-[ :'( :-\
Exactly Robbo, it's not quite the manual I was after (I'm married after all and have no use for a sex guide), more like the "Wife" manual would be useful. Does anyone know how they work?
:o
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: gibberish on January 20, 2004, 09:53:02 am
Oh bugger, I'm still pi**ing myself at this quote'
"As you would expect from Haynes, this manual contains detailed explanations of how the relevant parts work and fit together, what happens if they don't, and what you can do about it. "
sheer genius
"As you would expect from Haynes, this manual contains detailed explanations of how the relevant parts work and fit together, what happens if they don't, and what you can do about it. "
sheer genius
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: mgmark on January 20, 2004, 11:26:29 am
Quote
How on earth do they do that with a woman
They can't - there will always be odd important looking bits left over, the purpose of which will either be unfathomable or redundant. :)
Quote
more like the "Wife" manual would be useful. Does anyone know how they work?
I gave up on trying to unravel the complexities and variables of this area a loonnnnggggg time ago - the ultimate Sisyphean task. As for a manual, it would be inaccurate within 5 minutes of publication.... ;D
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Ruptured Duck Motorsport on January 20, 2004, 12:13:35 pm
I think even Haynes would have to stop at doing a manual for "woman" :o
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: gibberish on January 20, 2004, 02:08:17 pm
As for a manual, it would be inaccurate within 5 minutes of publication.... ;D
Ah, so true ???
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Rhino on January 20, 2004, 11:53:17 pm
Do you think they will star each task for difficulty, and what tools will you need?
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: jpchenet on January 21, 2004, 10:02:13 am
Will they recommend where you can obtain a new tool???
Oh no, I already get plenty of spam emails offering that ;)
Oh no, I already get plenty of spam emails offering that ;)
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Steve Pyro on January 21, 2004, 02:50:07 pm
Will they recommend where you can obtain a new tool???
Or specialist equipment like those for sale in Ann Summers and other reputable Soho establishments?
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Stu on January 21, 2004, 03:14:54 pm
How on earth do they do that with a woman :-[ :'( :-\
This ones going to show how to screw the arse of a woman.
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Mr. Rick on January 21, 2004, 03:17:02 pm
...... other reputable Soho establishments?
Used to go to Soho a lot when I lived "darn sowf".
And before you all start, it was to go to see bands at the Marquee in Wardour Street (before it moved to Charing Cross Road).
One night, me and a mate were on our way back to his car up by Centrepoint and had just left the Marquee when we were apporached by this lovely young thing asking if we were interested in girls, to which we obviously replied a resounding "yes", she then proceeded to try to convince us to go back to her flat to see her friends, at which point we remembered whereabouts in London we were and politley declined.
We carried on and talked about it deciding that she was far too sweet a thing to be caught up in all this nasty business and decided to go back to try to talk her out of it and to come home with us!!! Couldn't find her. We have never forgiven ourselves!! ;D
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: jpchenet on January 21, 2004, 05:47:13 pm
Something tells me your first impressions were probably right Rick!!
Either that or her boyfriend and ten mates were waiting there to mug you!!
Either that or her boyfriend and ten mates were waiting there to mug you!!
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Mr. Rick on January 21, 2004, 06:38:06 pm
It was the two slappers hanging out of the window and waving at us that rather gave it away!!
;)
;)
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Robbo SPS on January 21, 2004, 09:54:45 pm
Did you meet my Birthday girls from last weekend then rick..... ::)
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Mr. Rick on January 22, 2004, 09:56:59 am
Did you meet my Birthday girls from last weekend then rick..... ::)
:D
Bet they'd be a tad worn round the edges now - this happened the best part of 20 years ago!!
;D
Title: Re:Haynes
Post by: Robbo SPS on January 23, 2004, 01:54:30 am
Did you meet my Birthday girls from last weekend then rick..... ::)
:D
Bet they'd be a tad worn round the edges now - this happened the best part of 20 years ago!!
;D
Certainly felt that way :-[
