Club Arnage

Deb will be cremated at Le Mans (where else?!) on Monday 10th September at 1100. I am NOT expecting droves of people to turn up. Some of you will have recognised that I am a more private person than was Deb, and I do not relish having to meet and greet many mourners. Reading pages of your generous tributes has had me on the ropes, believe me! An online event at 1000 BST sounds like a lovely way to celebrate her passing - raising a pint at a more suitable time also sounds appropriate.

We are still negotiating the final resting place of the ashes, which is subject to strict rules in France. The funeral director is being as helpful as he can within the law.

Ian,
Thank-you for the update, I think the on-line gathering would be a nice idea

I'm in. Let's beat that 'most people online' in the footnote...

Ian,

I understand your wish for a very private ceremony - I'll be there in spirit. And I hope you find a resting place for the ashes which suits you - authorities here in Germany can be a pain in the ass too on this topic.

Take care of yourself and I'll join the online meeting, good idea. And I'll raise my glass on Deb at that time - I've had early morning beers in the past for much less important reasons.

Best

Werner

I will be in France, on Monday, on a weeks vacation, so will pull over at 1100,and pay my respects, and raise a glass of real ale in your memory Deb,that night.
Would have taken part in the log on if I had been at home, go for it guys.

i will be workin' i am afraid, but will be there in thoughts for sure

I'll be in Manchester but will pull over at 10am GMT for a minute's silence and thought. Chin up Ian, we'll all be thinking about you both. Steve

Ok Mad road trip planned, - Have checked with Ian - he thinks it funny and he is sure Deb would have found funny


sure would Deb have seen it Funny
I'm planning to go to Deb's funeral on Monday, a nice quick day road trip.
Going out Brittany Ferry - Out - Sun 11ish into France 7.15ish drive to Le Mans for 11am -
and then mad return

Monday night 11pm ferry back to Blighty and back in the UK at about 7ish on Tue
Cost for ferry 2 people = £85. 3 people = £113, 4 people = £141. any more than that we need a big car :-)
Let me know as I need to book on Friday night

I too will be working, but at 10.00gmt, I will attempt to sneak online at work to join the log-in, but Deb will certainly be in my thoughts.

I will be online, at work. I'll be there in spirit. And I hope you find a resting place for the ashes thay both you and Debs would have been happy with.

Very generous plan Neil (as always) unfortunately unable to partake.

I'll be online at 10am and will be thinking of all those in LM and Deb.

I am taking a professional exam on monday or I would have been in with you Neil. Bon Voyage!

I think this is a good tribute to Deb and wholy respecting Ian on a sad occasion
My thoughts for Deb's memories are with you Ian, Kind regards, I hope your wishes for a fitting resting place come to being agreed.
A coffe will be raised in her memory.

I will certainly be online, need reminder in outlook to remind me.............

Will join the tribute at the appropriate time from Mallorca - in mind at least...

Will be at work and will be online - even the most senior officer seeking my counsel over that time will be simply ignored.

MG Mark

I shall be home practicing my forklift moves as I have the test for my license on Tuesday. 

It's not often that time zones work in my favour, however it shall be 8pm at night down here - a fine time to stop what I'm doing, get online, and raise a pint to Deb.

Dx

With the cremation on Monday, this weekend I have to compose an eulogy. It will need to be in both languages, but I am determined that it should be all mine - the French may be weak, but it will be the best I can do, with a little help from online dictionaries etc!
Inasmuchas I have been a bit curmudgeonly about invitations to the event, I feel the least I can do is publish it here after I have delivered it - and I can also tell you how far I got if I fell to bits on the way. Cunning plan - as recommended by a friend's vicar - is to have a copy with a sensible member of the mourners, who can step in and read to the end if I am unable to continue. As I may have mentioned, I have a hard act to follow, with Deb delivering first rate eulogies for both her father and her sister.

I seem to have failed to post about the plastic duck on here - apologies. When she was very young, Deb bought her father a yellow plastic duck for his birthday - like y'do. (?) More than 30 years later, when he died, it was still in his bathroom, and since then it has been in ours. The Funeral Director suggested that it is quite normal to have a keepsake in the coffin - guess where the duck will be on Monday! The FD was quite happy to accept the plastic duck, said it was most suitable, and enjoyed its provenance.

Ian,  I've been doing the same thing this weekend - it seems that the French, for all their awkwardness, do seem to put a funeral on a little quicker than the english - it'll be two weeks to the day when we cremate my mother in law, since her passing.  Anyway - I've found a quote, which I thought was very apt for Deb, as well as Jean and I wanted to share it with you - this one has gone straight into my Eulogy.    

"To live on in the hearts of others, is to never die".  

Wishing you every strength in your delivery.

Thanks Brad, that is a memorable quote indeed.

The cremation went as well as these thing can, and I got through my 8-page eulogy. There were about 30 mourners,which was ideal for me to meet and greet. CA was brilliantly represented by JDS, Nopanic and Wishy, and we spent a few minutes chatting after others had gone, which was brill in itself. We thought that probably Brad was the last CA-er - apart from me - to see Deb alive, and the warmth of your exchange when you'd gone back to Silverstone in the face of huge sadness, and Deb was so grateful to see you, and so overcome by your distress, was such that it was a great sign-off from the Forum that had brough Deb so much joy over the years.

I hope to meet many of you next year - at Le Mans!
 

Good to hear. See you next year.

Looking forward to seeing you in La Sarthe in June Ian.

Ian,

Well done and nicely put.  See you at La Sarthe.

Mark

Ian, I'm glad to hear you summoned the strength to deliver your eulogy - It's one of those things in my opinion - like the strength a mother summons when her child is trapped under something heavy - somehow you just find it. 

I think you're right - I believe I was the last person from this forum to see Deb.  It also seems fitting that the reason that the situation even arose, was because of an act of kindness in order to preserve memories of my little boys first motor racing event (and the minor matter of both of us forgetting to either offer, or ask for the keys to the car!).   My final memories of Deb are ones which typify her attendance at such events - generous, kind and jovial - whilst she was obviously ill, she was determined to enjoy Silverstone - I really believe she did as well.   

But most of all - there are things that Deb said to me, in the middle of the most challenge period of my life if I'm honest, that have given me such strength, and such comfort over the last couple of weeks - to paraphrase some words that you directed to me a little earlier - Your wife was a helluva girl. 

Anyone who wants to read my eulogy, which mainly consist of a potted digest of Deb's life, can find a copy here. I'm afraid I haven't edited out the French paragraphs - and if you speak/read good French, you can have a laugh at some of it!

https://dl.dropbox.com/u/104274476/Eulogy.rtf

Ian,

thanks for sharing this. Hope to meet you again next June, at the latest!

Thank you for sharing this with us Ian, she was a special Lady.

Ian,

Thanks for posting the link with its content - it's a really good tribute to Deb, with such deep colours and richness to it.

Mark

Thanks for that Ian, I never knew that Debs was originally from Colne, Lancashire. Ironically I was watching a friend from Colne win a motor racing World title on Sunday.

Beautifully said Ian.

Straight from the heart. Well said Ian.